Day 1: I Declare I'm A...

There's something of a pattern of reluctance towards putting any "labels" on myself.... I don't call myself a runner (even though I've run ridiculous distances). And I certainly don't call myself a writer (even though I have this on-again-off-again blog). Somehow I am more comfortable with calling myself a "person who runs" or a "person who writes." 


This slight technical difference in words makes me feel less defined by the action, or less committed to the image of the label. Somehow I've managed to concoct some specific view of what I think a good writer should be. I don't write like ___, whose authentic and transparent voice I admire. I'm not sarcastic and smart in my writing like ____. I won't get you rolling on the floor laughing like ____. I'm not even a grammar geek or grammar nazi. My vocabulary feels too simple. I'm not a strong reader, so how could I be a good writer? I mean, who goes and gets a Bachelors in Communication, deliberately avoiding taking a single English class? 


To declare I am a writer feels like too much accountability to let anyone outside my own head hear it. In the world of my head, I am safe and content to simply dream up ideas, but never really act on them. I remember talking with some close friends about some ideas I was excited to explore. Several months later, I ran into one of them shopping at a craft show. As we caught up, she asked, "So, how's it going with getting _____ going?" Oops, did I share that idea out loud? Can I take it back?


Recently I was doing an online quiz where you had to choose the best word out of each set of four words that best describes you. There was a defining parameter - to choose your answer based on what you were like as a child. It actually tripped me up a little because in a lot of ways I have changed. But I think what they were getting at was the idea that we are often our most natural selves in childhood, with the least inhibitions and piles of fears or hurt that inevitably accumulate as we grow into adults navigating our way through life in the world. 


It got me thinking about the intense, unfiltered, fearless little girl I used to be. This writing challenge reminded me that I used to create illustrated story books  when I was about 8. I wrote a simple story line, and I even drew some pictures (though I still claim I can't draw to save my life now). 

What happened to her? I think it's time to respond to the divine whisper I heard in my heart not long ago to write more. I think it's time to call her out again.

Hey, World! I declare I am a writer.  
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This post is my effort in taking up Jeff Goin's Day 1 of Great Habits of Writers Challenge. 

4 things

Ok, because I'm in full procrastinating mode, here is a post I started months ago but never got around to finishing. It is inspired and requested by Queena's list of 7 things and I was reminded by Jocelyn's list of 4 things to revisit and finish my list. I've combined both of their lists and taken Joc's cue for 4 instead of 7 (it was hard enough coming up with 4 for each!). Here they are, starting with the easiest to answer progressing to the most difficult to answer...

4 places/provinces I've lived:

1. Saskatchewan (Saskatoon, Regina)
2. Ontario (Ottawa, Toronto, Guelph)
3. British Columbia (Vancouver, Burnaby, Coquitlam)
4. Alberta (Calgary)

4 places I've been on vacation:

1. New York City
2. Vietnam
3. Mexico
4. Spain/UK

4 places I still want to see:

1. Africa
2. France
3. Nunavut
4. Israel

4 favourite foods:

1. Sushi (especially alaska rolls from Sushi Garden!)
2. ok this is terrible, I can't think of anything else that ranks high enough, so I'm going to specify my favourite sushi rolls for the remaining three on this list (because sashimi goes without saying!)... so #2 is chopped scallop roll
3. a good barbequed eel roll
4. pretty standard house roll (crab, avocado, tamago, tuna and salmon)

4 TV shows I like to watch:

1. CSI (most often Miami, but also the other two)
2. Grey's Anatomy
3. Law and Order
4. The Apprentice

4 movies I could watch over and over:

1. Finding Nemo
2. Matrix (the first one)
3. Lord of the Rings (all of them)
4. Ocean's Eleven

4 jobs I've had (I'll list my favourite ones):

1. Parliamentary Page (aka Glorified Gopher and PR program for the Government of Canada... check out if you can spot me in the goofy group photo I found online)
2. Graphic Designer and Customer Service at a print shop in Calgary (worked with the most amazing family who owned the shop)
3. Employee Communications at Campbell Soup (the best cafeteria and cheap Godiva chocolates around)
4. My current job I love, but don't have an accurate title to describe it :) I like it because I get to work with ideas and people for a God that I love

4 things I want to do before I die:

1. Travel from one end of Canada to the other
2. Learn to consistently live out a Sabbath-keeping life, or else I will die sooner with my natural pace of life!
3. More officially develop and launch a line of inventive wedding invitations
4. Get married (gasp! dare I utter it aloud? anyone who knows me well would recognize this as a miracle that God is working in my heart...)

4 things I cannot do:

1. Look at a document without considering its visual appearance/design and/or making a subconscious note about its usage of fonts
2. Sing harmony without the help of a strong voice beside me
3. Travel to a city and not call everyone I may know there
4. Eat without doing something else at the same time (read, talk with someone, watch tv...)

4 books that resonate most with my life:

1. Orbiting the Giant Hairball: A Corporate Fool's Guide to Surviving with Grace
2. What Color Is Your Parachute?
3. Life Inside the Thin Cage
4. The Bible

4 things I say often:

1. "in the sense that..."
2. absolutely!
3. no worries
4. can't think of a fourth... you tell me what I say the most! :)

4 things that attract me to a guy:

1. Self-awareness that fuels their own continual growth as a person
2. Other-awareness that translates into caring for others and for creation
3. God-awareness that recognizes, seeks out, follows and surrenders to the Divine
4. Walking on a similar path, headed in a similar direction (i.e. complementary calling in life)

Tag, you're it (people I want to see do this, should you feel the urge to procrastinate):

1. Florence
2. Shannon
3. Hengz
4. Matthea

a beautiful day

Well, I survived the wedding... I heard mostly negative things about the experience of being a bridesmaid from other friends, so I wasn't sure what to expect. But I am quite pleased to say it was a positive experience.
As would be expected, we were up late the night before with last minute preparations and heart-to-heart talks. So after not much sleep, the day began with a few hours of getting ready for the ladies. As we hung out at the salon getting our makeup and hair ready, I couldn't help but think how much more work it is to be a girl. Blah. We were running late due to a miscommunication with the makeup lady and also due to how thick my hair was to dry and straigthen. They kept suggesting I volunteer my hair to be in a hair ad. Now if I could get paid for it, I may have a new side business....hmmm....I also mentionned I wanted to retry dying my hair into the bright purple streaks again, but it was met with protests. Gotta think some more about that....

Anyway, after quickly getting dressed, we were on our way in a vintage Rolls Royce chauffered by the owner of the car, a cute little old man named Alf. We took the quickest route which happened to be quite scenic (all the way through Stanley Park) and made it to the photo shoot only about 20 minutes late. A beautiful day to shoot photos at Kits beach overall.

Then off to Grouse Mountain we went. The ceremony was simple and beautiful. Viv and Graham both got a little teary-eyed. The visiting was fun. The food was divine. The cake was the best wedding cake I've ever tasted (custom designed, it was white chocolate blueberry key lime). The sugared blueberries had the texture of the perfect cookie -- crispy on the outside and soft on the inside. Even the chocolate party favours were colour coordinated to the theme colours of blue and dark brown. Leave it to Viv to throw such a coordinated and pretty party.



My toast to Viv tributed her for her deep loyalty and commitment to her friends and to celebrating. Relationships and celebrations are the intangible and invaluable priorities of life that make it worth living and fun along the way. From her I learned how to throw a party to mix all my friends together for a good time of celebration to value people and laughter. I'm thankful for the gift of being able to spend this day with her.

summing the summer in images (so far)

Ok, so as is evident from the absence of any recent posts, I have not been in much of a blogging mood as of late. I'm still not too inspired to write anything, so I thought I would post a few photos to help me remember at a later date what this summer's been about so far.

It's been perfect to just stay in the city and catch up with friends mostly. Really enjoyed the rare treat of catching up with my close girlfriends when Shermeen was in town.



And then of course there is all the catching up with old friends at the inevitable summer weddings . It should be interesting from another perspective this week as I'll be in my first wedding and throwing my first shower for a friend this weekend.


And of course, finally, the kayaking in this city is breathtaking. Ann and I went out to Jericho beach this time and we took our time paddling around and didn't try to bust it out to the extreme. (That's Ann in the photo). What a great way to catch up with a friend on the water. I forgot how green this city is. I didn't get the shots I wanted of the sunset on the cityline... I'll have to wait until a little later this summer when the sun sets earlier.



In between all that I'm not taking any official holidays this summer so have been busy on work stuff and design projects for friends. Glad to have mostly finished some book promo stuff for a self-published friend, the usual wedding design projects and great fun working with my sister to design her business card as a soon-to-be-fresh-grad. Anyone know someone who could use a bright, organized Library Scientist and Information Specialist with a sharp ability to research and write? Preferably in Vancouver so she can be close to her sister :) She is now the third most degreed person in our family! (behind Aunt Paulina and Dad)



Free movie previews seems to be a gift that I have been given this summer, which is unusual for me but a welcome treat. Ann treated me to Superman Returns, and then Mary let me in on free passes for World Trade Center. I love how movies make me think and see life in a different way.

And, a simple pleasure I have missed and caught up on this season is reading!

Fireworks finale of the Celebration of Lights -- combined with a birthday party at Ann's beautiful apartment by English Bay so we don't have to battle the crowds on the beach tomorrow night. We'll see if we get any good shots. Or I may end up subbing in my sister's photos of fireworks from Canada Day in Ottawa -- she has a slick digital SLR and the ability to be creative with it.

I just noticed that I have a tendency to focus on events... to counteract it a wee bit, I will add that there has been a lot of activity in the heart department, shall we say. God continues to take his flashlight into the dark parts of my heart and is consistently doing spiritual heart surgery in there. Growth is good, despite the pain that comes. The surgery is worth it especially when there is better life on the other side of it :)

Overall, good times, good friends, good weather, gorgeous surroundings...I know that I have been blessed with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly realms (as I am reminded in the book of Ephesians) but I can truly say I am also blessed with every blessing in the earthly realms this summer as well. God is so good!

my tongue is pasty from too much sugar

When I came home from NYC on Friday and caught up on my email, there was an e-vite from my roommate Dilys inviting me to her birthday party which was to be held at our house. Yay! Party at our house! I love it when people get together and have a good time, especially when it's at my place :) It was a delightful evening of friendship, belly dancing, weird body tricks, chocolate fondue, birthday cupcakes and way too many other sugar options.
Turns out (not suprisingly so) Dilys has talented literary friends who composed great haikus and even limericks in honour of the birthday girl. Poetry has never been my forte, so my tribute to my roommate for her 24th will be in the form of an acronym of ways she has enriched my life:
D - Dilys engages me in discussions that make me think and stretch my thoughts (in a good way!)
I - These discussions are ever so enriching because of the insight they offer to helping me understand the world around me... Dilys is very insightful!
L - She cleary loves people and has a compassion for others, which stems from her enduring love for God
Y - Dilys may be youthful at the age of 24, but she has that rare combination of also being very wise beyond her years
S - As serious as Dilys can be, every once in awhile, she always cracks me up and catches me off guard when she makes surprising comments that I would never expect to come out of her mouth (like when she says "Dude!")
I'm thankful for you Dilys!
Food photos courtesy of the great eye of Stefanie Coutinho

top 10 memorable things from the Big Apple

1. Experiencing God's presence and power so clearly at the Redeemer Prayer Conference (the reason that brought us out to New York in the first place). It was amazing to see the fruit of answers to prayers that so many people invested in the conference for months ahead.
2. Yummalum food... the best Italian food I've had in a long while (you know you can't get any really good Italian in Vancouver!), delish deli food and burgers, cheesecake... the list goes on because 99% of what we tasted was super tasty!
3. The amazing creativity of The Lion King. I originally had apprehensions that it would be hokey, but they really pulled it off with imaginative sets and choreography and convincing acting. My favourite animal in the show was the giraffe, of course!
4. The Pajama Game, a top-notch Broadway production starring Harry Connick Jr... Not only was it a phenomenal show, but we had technical difficulties, which resulted in the treat of Harry coming out to entertain us with a candid Q&A time.
5. Catching up with old friends Tina and Jessica, from a summer city mission trip in Vancouver in '99.
6. Visiting Tina's small group study. The people were super friendly and welcoming. The topic on knowing our limits and trusting God for the rest was personally convicting and timely.
7. Enlightening and insightful chats with Mary, my wise co-worker who travelled with me.
8. Hearing the multiple languages at every turn and seeing the diversity of cultures throughout the city.
9. Finding my way around the city, even feeling like a New Yorker at moments -- like the four times people asked me for directions!
10. Circling the air at JFK airport for 2 hours due to weather and air traffic, running out of gas, flying to Toronto to refuel, finally landing back in NYC. I couldn't believe how alive and bustling the airport was at 2am. By the time we survive lineups, we arrive in time to enjoy 5 hours of our $180 hotel in Manhattan before our 9am meeting. Why am I listing this as a highlight? Just for how sheerly ludicrous it is -- only in NY!

yes, I'm still alive...barely!

It's June... what happened to May?? Here is an uneventful account of an eventful month:

• First was the very cool week-long course on dialogue education at SFU
• Then there was the road trip down to Birmingham with the roommies
• Then the best birthday party ever with the best gift ever (scrapbook full of notes and cards from friends... Words of affirmation are my primo love language) Thanks everyone, especially Rach, Dilys and Becks!) [see the photo on the right on the bottom -- my favourite shot from the whole evening!]
• Then getting high on checking things off my to-do-list by making a mad dash to finish a whole bunch of projects, including work related and self-inflicted creative projects before leaving for a week in...
  
• Atlanta -- my first time in the deep South. Learned all kinds of helpful tricks from our ministry partners who run the Church Planting Leadership Assessment there. Bonus: learned some interesting lessons about myself in the process. Briefly toured the world headquarters for Coca Cola.
• Back for 5 days in Vancouver, again running around getting high on checking things off my to-do-list, mostly in preparation for...
• New York City! John, Mary and I are headed out there to help train and encourage Redeemer Church in prayer. The conference is over in a jiffy (7 hours in 2 days), then Mary and I are trolling the city for 5 days. Good thing we have similar interests! Looking forward seeing God alive and working in a different context...

Phew -- I'm tired! I am quite looking forward to settling down for the rest of the summer to enjoy all that Vancouver has to offer. I do have to make up for kayaking time lost last summer!
But for now, off to pack for the Big Apple...

weekend whirlwind: roommate road trip

Great roommate road trip this weekend! Thanks to Dilys clicking into "Yes, I'm a tourist and I'm going to take a ton of photos because that's what tourists do!" mode, I also snapped a few pics. Here goes...

First, there was the necessary task of killing time in the car at the border crossing. When our turn was up, the American border guard apologized that we'd been randomly selected for a car check. Funny to encounter an apologizing American -- it's usually Canadians who are the ones who are constantly saying "sorry." Funnier still was when he asked us what kind of music we were going to see live in concert. Dilys simply turned up the volume in response so he could hear for himself!

Then we grabbed some lunch at the main mall in Bellingham. Dilys and Becki had Taco Time, (since we don't get as much Mexican food up in Vancouver), while I had a sandwich from Subway (uninventive I know, but I couldn't bear the greasy feeling of those temptingly yummy mexi fries). Took some goofy photos in a photo booth (will scan shots in later).

Did a bit of shopping at Ross (like Winners, but cheaper). That was a bit chaotic. What a mess. Not worth photo documenting. Got into a short and slightly amusing conversation with the Filipino family behind us who had a garden-sized dwarf from Snow White. It made Rebecca want to get a "garden gnome" for the patio.

And whaddaya know, it's dinner time before we realize it -- time for more Mexican food! We found this great little restaurant. It was a gorgeous old building, with vintage decor, funky atmosphere and service. Tasty home made salsa (token food shot in honour of my shutter-bug sister). I thought it was great that Becki basically had Jack Daniels ice cream with checkerboard shortbread cookies for dinner (with a side salad).

After dinner we had to kill some time before the doors opened for the show we came to see in the first place. Bellingham is quite the quaint little town. I totally loved (and was impressed!) how there was children's art displayed in windows of all kinds of businesses that we walked by (complete with artist's descriptions of their works), even in the window of a billiards club! The artwork really went a long way in bringing colour, cheer and life to the town's streets.

We closed the night out taking in the beautiful melodies of Over the Rhine (I found their piano arrangements were especially simply fabulous and moving). Their tunes are generally more reflective and sauntering in tempo, but they played a couple of new tunes that were a bit more upbeat and "optimistic" (in their choice of words) and quite fun. The only thing was one small observation that struck me a bit strange. I've never been to a show where people were sitting on the floor watching quietly like the folks who were there. I was standing up swaying to the music, trying to let it get in my bones a bit. I would've gotten into it more, but it seemed out of place with everyone else so mellow.

On the way home we radio-surfed and car-danced at times to "lively" music to help with Becki's driving concentration. Somehow that same choice of loud music just didn't seem to be appropriate when we stumbled into the car on Sunday morning to drive to church with the car radio still on from last night...

All in all it was a fun night but man I paid for it on Sunday. I'm so ready for bed. G'dnight!

bit by the travel bug

I've never been one of those people who needed to do the backpack-across-Europe thing. I've always wanted to drive across Canada and see my own land first as it is vast, varied and beautiful.

But my trip to Vietnam last summer made me want to travel and experience cultures that are different than mine (though I am not Vietnamese, I could relate to the cultural values a lot being raised to think more Chinese than I may realize most days). The Territories of Canada and Africa were first to come to mind as places that I want to experience that are quite different than what I know.

Today I saw The Constant Gardener. There were many excellent elements of the film, but the cinematography was simply breathtaking and gorgeous. Despite the seriousness and despair of the film's depiction of Africa, it still reminded me of my desire to visit this part of the world. I've always thought it to be a beautiful, colourful and lively people, culture and land. And my favourite animal (the giraffe) resides there!

I'm thankful that my job periodically provides opportunities to travel. May will bring a week in Atlanta, and I just received news today that I will be able to go to New York to help with a conference for work in June... I am excited and grateful for the opportunity as I loved the first taste I enjoyed of it back in 2003. I am a light packer and didn't spare any room for extra shoes so I was trekking around town in my open-heeled shoes (clogs) during the blizzard of the century that happened to coincide with our visit. But because of the blizzard, I was able to meet up with a friend whom I didn't even know was in town who had her work cancelled that day.

I think what I enjoy about travelling is that it gets me outside of myself, my usual routine, and my comfort zone to experience God and his creation in new ways. I've seen God tangibly involved in my travels, protecting me, directing my steps, filling my heart with awe and appreciation for the diversity of his creation of people, cultures and lands. In such a vast world to us, it blows my socks off that God cares for each person on this planet so tiny to him.

an unexpected post-Christmas treat

After 9 hours of travel, I finally arrived back safely at my home in Vancouver. I was only travelling from Saskatchewan, which should take an average flight time of 4 hours. I was too interested in taking the latest flight out in the afternoon and failed to notice there was a 3 hour layover in Edmonton (plus the 2 hour delay from Regina).

Anyway, I got home just in time to make the beds and set the towels and chocolates on the pillows just in time for my cousin Christal from Ottawa and her friend to come stay with me for the week. They're in town for a wedding of a high school friend of theirs who happens to go to my church. It'll be fun to go out on the town and ring in the new year with her at this wedding, though it feels admittedly a bit weird to do that with her (she will always be in my mind my little cousin!) Six degrees of separation continues to be true -- one of her friends in Vancouver turns out to be a friend of one of my roommates who was here for our Christmas party earlier this month!

I was looking in the paper for a show to take Christal to... I thought perhaps improv, but the timing didn't work out. Instead, we went to take in the Nutcracker by Ballet BC. This is something I've always wanted to do but not so badly that I've ever looked it up. I thought it was playing before Christmas while I was away, but lucky for me it was playing this Boxing Week and Christal was into it too.

What a treat! I think this beats the live theatre and symphony for me personally. I just love the grace and movement that flow from the dancers. If I can ever get my butt in gear, I want to take dance lessons again as a form of staying active. I look back on my dance memories of childhood with great fondness.

Speaking of childhood dance memories, while I was in Regina this time, my dad somehow dug out our old childhood dance costumes. They were soooooo cute! Most of the great ones were my sister's. The two funniest ones had to be the cute little yellow leotard that had the rows of soft feathers on the bum for the "six little ducks that I once knew" dance (my sister was 3 I think at the time) and the white leotard with gaudy giant silver sequins that my mom painstakingly sewed on one at a time for the dance where they imitated LA show girls, complete with a white fur thing they threw around. What a hoot we had laughing at the cuteness of the costumes (though we weren't laughing at the not-so-pleasant smell coming from the outfits!).

an unexpected thanksgiving

For Thanksgiving this year, I was deliberately planning on lying low, despite knowing there would be many open doors welcoming me to gluttonous turkey dinners, if I so chose to indulge.

Instead, on the Saturday of the long weekend, my two roommates decided relatively last minute to have a Thanksgiving dinner. I figured I could offer to do my 5 minute cranberry chicken. It may not be turkey, but hey, it has cranberry in it. And it's easy to make.

Well, my roommates would not hear of such a thing. They were set on roasting a turkey.

It turned out really nice. While we waited for the turkey to finish roasting, we all sat on the couch and did some reading. It was peaceful to just sit in their company even though we were not in direct conversation.

Then Dilys read an excerpt from a book she was reading to direct our thoughts. We followed with a short time of prayer thanking God for all the amazing things he's given us in life. Then we chowed down on the turkey (along with Stove Top stuffing and gravy from a package).

Then we vegged in front of the TV for the rest of the night.

We realized it was the first time we've sat down to eat together, all three of us, since Rebecca moved in 3 weeks ago.

At some point in the evening, a key realization struck me which I chose to share with the others. I contemplated out loud to them, "You know girls, I think I am finally getting used to having other people around." After 3 years living with a roommate who was hardly ever home, I'd gotten used to living practically on my own.

This is a sign of growth -- evidence of God working in my life. It's a big deal as I continue to work on learning to live interdependently with people, rather than being overly independent which is my default mode. Back in February when I prayed, "Jesus, I am finally willing to begin to learn an interdependent way... please bring situations in my life that will help me grow in this way." I had no idea the answer would come in the form of roommates.

Thank you Jesus for the way that you work so unexpectedly to answer our prayers and grow us to live more like you do.